We’ve all seen this picture before and had that ‘AHA!’ moment…but we forget. So. Many. Times. Success and progress are not linear. Kids don’t learn to read in a day. Multiplication tables include many nights of crying (from kids and parents). College had it’s ups and down. Our careers take unexpected detours. And healthy changes will too. And it’s normal.
See that tangle of curly cues in the middle of this picture? That’s where we learn something my clients know as ‘Breaking a Link in the Chain.’ Here’s an example:
- It’s 3pm. I’m tired. I’m a bit grumpy. I walk through the kitchen/staff room and notice some cookies on the counter and take one.
- It’s 3:10 and I’m still tired and grumpy. That cookie was good. I’ll have just one more.
- It’s 3:15. I find another reason to walk through the kitchen/staff room. There goes another cookie.
- …..It’s 3:45. I’m on a sugar rush because I’ve eaten all the cookies. Dang it!
It happens to everyone. Maybe it’s not cookies…maybe it’s chips, M&Ms, alcohol, popcorn, whatever. The normal 1st response is to beat ourselves up and repeat the same routine the next day. But at Thrive we work to pay attention to these patterns so we can find the link that can break the chain. Here’s what that looks like:
- It’s 3pm. I’m tired and grumpy. I’ve noticed that I tend to find reasons to walk through the kitchen/staff room at this time and that always leads to uncontrolled munching.
- I make a conscious decision to try something new today….just to see what happens. I set a timer and go for a 5m walk outside.
- It’s 3:10. Walk is done and I’m not as tired or grumpy. I go back to work.
OR:
- It’s 3pm. I’m tired and grumpy. I realize I’m kind of hungry too and haven’t drunk any water since lunch. I know if I walk through the kitchen/staff room right now I’m primed to eat the first thing I see.
- I make a conscious decision to drink a glass of water and eat an apple and some a few almonds.
- It’s 3:15. I can feel some brain fog lift and realize I was just hungry and thirsty.
Did you see the links in that chain? 3pm is a really common time to hit a wall. We’re a bit tired. We’ve been sitting for quite a while and have probably hit some stress along the way. It’s been 3-4 hours since lunch. There are plenty of valid reasons to be tempted to reach for comfort food right then and that’s exactly what we’ll do if we don’t take an honest look at what’s going on. But as soon as we have a clearer view of what’s really going on we can make a different choice and experiment with a different choice.
And that’s where the curly cues come in! They aren’t failures…they’re opportunities to spot a link that’s not working for us and try something new! Ask anyone who has succeeded in an area you’re struggling in and they’ll share plenty of curly cues with you…you can do this!
Go find your curly cue today!
